Sunday, February 25, 2007
**his reply
<233am>precious said alot on her blog.. these go thru my head as i read line after line.. tings r gng down.. sad but true tings r nt gettin to where we both want.. dun tink we can blame either party.. but blive tat if we make it thru tis.. we can make it thru anytin..
ive nv evr had e slightest tot of u evr makin use of me cos its simply out of point aft all we've been thru.. i tot abt ur ideas of me wen ya out wif ya frens.. n ive tot it thru u deserve t b happy n enjoy e outings cos somehow i cant make u as happi as they can make u.. sad but as long as ur happy.. n u really deserve if aft all ur workload.. tinkin abt ya workload.. im sorry tat i cant help.. fuckin wish at times tat im in nus.. watevr..
i noe u initiated e movie.. haha really loved e movie trip.. until tings get better.. i dun expect u t giv me 100% attention esp wif ya work load n all.. u ah little precious really mus take care of yaself.. i noe i said it a mil times alr.. u noe wat.. ya temper is really gettin better.. haha really.
me tinking too much.. yea cant deny tat but over time alot of tings sort themselves out.. n trust me i hate tinkin so much as well.. hey princess.. always noe tat u r my number 0.. use t tink ur my number 1 but realised i put u b4 1 so its 0.. Love ya precious..
**hope things reali aint that bad.
Saturday, February 24, 2007
This is my 1001 post. time flies.
i have been writing dwn so much shit over these -cant reali rem how long- periods. im feeling not very well tdy, and i seriously dun feel the slightest love as i used to have. things changed, people changed, even feelings might juz go dwnhill. i tot things will pick up but instead it sinks further in depth. u can very comfortably said im over sensitive, but i know fairly well, is not my own imagination that stir all these thoughts. I have no intention to ask u to pick mi up as im out of ways to reach my destination. it is not that im f eager to go, but rather juz to show my face for the hi bye people, people whom i need to build rapport with. trust mi, i rather stay put in my room, be it staring at the msn, typing non stop or mugging my way to hell then to trouble you. Ur tone was simply beyond what i could accept, im sorry if u felt that im making use of you.. believe mi, i will not ask anymore favour from you in future. guess i did my part, i was out for supper with frenz and i wont wan u to feel neg - coz u always feel weird when im out with frenz which i have no idea whats wrong, dont u go out with frenz and did i ever feel weird, i initate a movie date. nowadays, im busy i know, and u are there doing ur gaming which piss mi off abit, true enough, i have neglected you but the fact is we are running out of topic to reali chat abt. u all people will only said things like that: go sleep, u dint have enough sleep. god, i cant even finished my assignments and you all people cant even help, can you all people juz leave mi alone and let mi do watever i have to do. by sleeping and gaining energy, and the pile of stuff will juz accumlated, wasnt it the same? im toking to myself more lately coz ur response either not favourable or no response at all, is either u are purely too engross with ur game or simply think i dun need any rely. i know im quick tempered, but whos in the position to blame my temper at this moment in time, why not u all people try staying at home for the whole week of CNY period and doing nothing but assignments? i lost my temper or simply ignore u all coz i reali run out of energy to reali care for those trivial stuff. i set my priorities right at the right moments, thats mi. if i have ample time, bring mi the most retarded stuff, i will do it for you. i felt that i need not have report any slightest stuff to you coz u are the one who started all these, since we are tgt long enough, i believe the reporting part proves redudant. if it ever comes across your mind, why aint i telling you much stuff lately - reasons? u tend to think otherwise and behave weirdly. i hate detest dislike it to max. "shld i be afraid?" one of the latest remark u made while im on my way home from sch - u might sound joking, but to me, u must have tot this way otherwise you wont even bother to speak it out. god. wats wrong?
Love this pic.
\\ ignore the fats.
Friday, February 23, 2007
Wanna know how sinful my CNY is.. check the amount of tempting goodies i have at home, how NOT gain weight??? god.. at the first place, why so many?? ha, since i NOT suppose to eat much, i help in ARRANGING them la har. wats life man?
wish im one, besides having worries of the saltness of the water, enough space to swim about.. guess its a happy fish. i wan to be it. be admired and worries free.
**pic courtesy of mister john. ha.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
im not expressive
doesnt mean i dont love u
im not into physical touch
doesnt mean i dont love u
i have never been one
since the day you know mi
no way i could change.
accept the way i am.
Sunday, February 18, 2007
he wrote:
<1140pm>scared.. at times fear really takes over my mind n somehow my eyes can get wet.. tears cld even run.. i dun even noe wat triggers except sense of fear.. fear of losing e 1 ting tat matters t me n never getting it back.. i really cant bear tat tot..
i feel:
<1143pm>sorry. i love you.
Photo'S' of the day:
(1) In front of the mirror - trying my new dress. love it to bits.
2) brand - fcuk, cost - 99bucks. too costly for a dress? i dun care, its so pretty!!!
_guess i have fetish for this sort of design, see behind - doesnt my bedsheet look the same?
**thks ver. =)
After CNY.. thats my SOLE AIM. do i need to say more? been chewing and swallowing tons of fats and permiting them to desposit EVERYWHERE on my body. god. KILL MI.
welcome to the new blogger, suck, i have no intention to change any status quo, but they insisted. following the two steps and here i am in the new stuff, new stuff to familarize which i detest alot. i hate adapting when i become comfy with it. why?
Happy CNY. to all out there. it is my fave period of the entire year, the stint that i enjoy the most and mood will usually be extremely gd. i skipped chinatown this year, no mood. i cant feel that im that relax as last year when i was working - with nothing to be reali worry abt when u were still in the junior level. but this year, the chu xi started with mugging, tho i admit - i wasnt concentrating much, i.e. thinking whats on for dinner tml, any yummy food, etc la; but at least, i touched abit here and there. to satisfy my guilt for not touching at all, although i doubt i absorbed much. the whole of chu xi was like blink blink - its over. with mi, and nothing seems to be awake dat this wee hr doing the old traditional of shuo ye for the sake of my parents. named mi lao tu, i dun care, i believe in.. i wan them to live as long as god permits.
to ver: you spolit my mood at the very last min. being sensitive is gd - everything thats overly dosed proves damaging. u asked why i took dwn the pics on the bulletin board and placed with something else.. did u realize, its still our neoprint up there? and the pic that we took in genting? miss those days. not much in our r/s now but the moments we used to have - and i dint opted to put up individual shot of myself. if i were to erase everything, i swear, no neoprints, no memories of our doings up at the bulletins, everything will be solely abt myself. i have no idea why do i have to explain all these to u, but seeing u so emo juz now, made mi freaking asshole. and what makes mi felt even more puzzled.. the abt mi session on friendster, oh plz, im not that brilliant to write that by myself, its extracted. why will that trigger any neg thoughts in you? i find it sweet and hence paste it there? so whats the whole issue here? do i have to explain even further and get myself even more puzzled? as EXPLAINED above for the chinatown issue. see above then. is not that i dint move the first move to reflect on myself, after last nitez, rather not nice meet up, i msg u to share ur joy over ur new hp purchase. didnt i do my part? *THKS for the bf.
rewind abit to yday.. lighten the mood. was out with joe, my sch dino no.2. i was like basically doing a fast forward shopping. coz im like so last min, desperate for so many stuff and when the season doent cater to u, you juz got to wait for the next. and it surely aint my season. nothing reali caught my eyes till the very last moments of the stores' operating hrs. empty hands and well, joe was patient enough to endure the fussy woman hes with. thks dino. i stand hard on my belief ya, rather than settle dwn on smthing i dun like, i settled for old clothes for CNY. i dun mind wearing previously wore stuff tho i know new year shld be embark with new stuff. who cares? as i always say.. beauty and look are equally superficial. appearance but no content = empty shell. ohh, i was like a non stop radio, toking non stop during the shop. think of it, i dint know im such a chatterbox, i used to be one in NP but the whole of last sem, i was dead. we brought home neoprints, ha, childish but its nice sharing those stupid moments. thks joe. u have been great. im sorry, i wanna be more expresssive in this post in regards to the outings, but its the wrong time to write abt the happy moments when i experienced shit juz now. but be assurance, i did njoy myself that outing!
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
haha, updating.. vday special post.
my 3rd gift:
ha, its not physically reachable la.
my blaw leader was innovative enough to..
send a PIC of thought to mi as vday gift.
wahahha, he deserve a thank you from mi afterall.
eletronic gift - haha, SOC student.
thks john.
my 4th gift:
my boy is the sweetest of all.
my fav lamb, potato, bacon and asparagus all in a dish.
is like so omg. and all were done by himself!
he deserve a kiss la.
ohh.. the first pic on the candle..
ya, its a candle light dinner in my room..
coz i have tuition on vday and home like LATE.
and i reserve my tummy empty the WHOLE DAY
juz for this meal.
and it worths the starving man.
thks dar!
**end of the vday in 30mins time.
memorable. nothing much happening.
sch, tuition and yet, is nice.
thks everyone. =)
hahahah
im bliss.
i had two vday gifts in advance,
all food..
sinful but happppppy!!!
1st: from my dino no. 2
ha, its the COOKIE MONSTER.
well, my dear JOE has broken it into pieces otherwise it will look like this.
ha, nvtheless, is my like!
yummmmy!
thks dino. hugz!
2nd: from my boy
its the set i wan la,
saw from sch vday bog, was so amazing pretty.
i will still ate coz i will be pretty after eating pretty stuff.
haha. love it to bits.
thks ver. muacks.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
thats what MY BESTIE IN SCH wrote on her blog:
"Actually i dont really know how to use the camera function, it's 10 freaking mega pixels buster! So exciting~FINALLY i get to take a picture with Jolene! She's my best friend in uni. It's funny how we've become so close, cos i remember my first impression of her was, 'wahlao this girl so dao', and her impression of me was, 'wahlao this girl wear so low-cut'. hahahahahha. But nonetheless, im very glad that we've become closer. She's like one of the very few people (cos im very kiam) whom i actually will buy something for if i see something that reminds me of her. My very own coooooookie monster :D"
haha, so touching la. cant resist wanting to copy her post and steal our photo and post on my blog. hahah, thks babe for being ard to bitch anything, or everything with mi. and of coz, polluating the air tgt. haha. i swear im gng to pass u ur stuff! i wanted to pamper u la.. weird, sound abit wrong. ohh, get mi str, im a str! i still like guys. haha. heres a kiss from the cookie monster!!! MUACKS!!!!
Heres hw she looks like: own VERY first decent pic la, been mentioning abt her so often..ha.
****two babes, how not to take another look har? =P
Monday, February 05, 2007
***************************
u have no idea how lost i was this afternoon,
assignment due in 2 days,
and i have yet to conduct an interview.
made a trip dwn with lindy to OCK
thks babe,
i enjoyed the chat on the journey there.
AND the mocha u bought for mi.
im so touched la,
someone actually remembers.
and i mean it when i said: im so touched.
thk you soooo much.
the trip would be damn unbearable if you were not ard
LOOK PRETTY tml at ur finance lect har.
ha.
interview was finally done.
phew,
tho it was a wasted trip,
but i managed to conduct interview with the CEO on the fone
for nearly an hr.
god,
he saved my life.
and f the AGM.
she insisted ignoring my pester - email and fone.
fine.
i survived u bitch.
ahh...
finally i can get my project re - rollllllllll
it has hanged there since last week.
aim: to get it done by tontiez after my tut.
ha.
one stone off the chest,
i could breathe slightly.
trust mi,
is so hard to pen dwn my emo nw.
so tired yet full of drive to complete the assignment
so happy yet sad over my tok with ver
mixture as you named.
nevertheless,
i still have to get all things done ya.
tata.
***************************
rely on on one.
i reali been feeling this way lately.
money,
moral support,
energy,
strength,
knowledge,
eveything, simply everything..
ask from urself.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
i have stayed home for 2 consecutive weeks.
weekends are abt tuition, home and still home.
i still miss my starbucks mocha.
but im juz too tied up by shit..
and im so tired to juz travel a 2NEL stops,
to get myself one.
yes, im that lazy.
.
.
.
.
vday coming..
i wan to take a break!!
Saturday, February 03, 2007
YUMMMMMMMMY.
i juz love chocolate.
thks jer.
for making the trip dwn to make up that night coz u make mi angry.
haha.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
another random post again. nothing much in particualr that i can pen dwn in essay form.
My Period
_one of my worst period ever for this month, i blamed on the fact that i have drank so much cold stuff and period was super overdue for this mth. first time, my vision went WHITE, or you called it blank, cold sweat all over and legs aint mine anymore. i sat dwn in the lift, sort of refusing to move where my house is less than 50 steps away. Yes, it was that bad. I tot it was the end of the world and i recalled the my worst period cramp in history - one that made mi fainted in bathroom. Ver was watching my drama, oh well, also watching over mi la. Ha, i actually asked him "dun go" when he needed to go for tuition. Geez, so mushy, some kinds of korean love movie. ha, i dint reme i said that coz i was half conscious in the mid of the unbearable pain. he claimed that i did, well, i doubted. or maybe, deep in mi, i reali need him. =)
My Frenz
_my babe in sch has been sooooo nice to mi, thks lindy! i love the cookie so much and not to forget, the sweet. it was one of my fave when i was in NP. touched, elated and well, finally i found someone i could name her as frenz and not acquitance. im here for ur problems, advice may not pro enough but at least, im listening! ohh, thks for the panties and shorts. ohh, the pad as well. =P cheer up babe, i love to see u bounce with that cheeky smile on ur face. =)
_my gay bitch in sch has been doing his duty as my msn partner. ha.. an unspoken promise to meet online and chat till 1am. well, my gay bitch needs beauty sleep, and the babe here needs no sleep. had botak jones for lunch and it was fun seeing him flirting with my man, oh god, i wish i could share my guy with him ya, but LOVE IS SELFISH. Joe, go find ur jean!! more outings in YOUR car. its time to waste ur petrol!
My Sch Stuff
_dun ask anymore abt my sch stuff. nothing to reali mention. tutorials, lectures, assignments, projects, wat else? im gng to screw big time if no companies shows pity on me. pray for mi. pray real hard.
p.s i wan to swim desperately. and im on period.
YUMMMMMMMMY.